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I have lurked all over Lotus‘ Weekly Winners posts for months and finally decided to pick up the camera and jump into the fray! 

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Winter Blooms

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A finished snack for the birds

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Catching raindropsimg_99301

The neighbor’s “masterpiece.” We’re still hoping that’s the primer…..

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I know this one was up the other day, but it’s my favorite this week!

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Don’t forget to check out Lotus’ Weekly Winners and see the other participants shots at Sarcastic Mom.

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It doesn’t rain often in the Las Vegas area, but when it does the desert comes alive. Yesterday afternoon the skies opened up and it started pouring. LW ran to the window and started begging to play outside – no umbrellas, please! I want to get wet! – so I threw his sweatshirt hood up, slipped on his Crocs (sorry Miss Attitude) and off we went into the backyard. 

While LW and the dog splashed in puddles, I played with the camera. I laid on the patio, I switched lenses, switched settings and had fun seeing what Herb (after the late Mr. Ritts, of course) was capable of.  Wow. I got some great shots!  I won’t bore you with all of my raindrops falling on the ground and puddles, but these are a few of my faves….

OK, ONE raindrops in the rocks picture….I promise there won’t be any more!

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Catching raindrops…

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Ferns need love too!

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LW dancing and praying for more rain!

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The kid has mad rain dancing skillz because it is STILL raining. The backyard is covered with puddles, it is cold and the house is filled with the smell of wet dog. Maybe we’ll go have a little more fun in the rain today!

Happy weekend!

Period Finished!

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I have something to say and it’s not pretty. I am entering uncharted waters here and my male readers may want to grab a life preserver in case they need to jump overboard. I need to get down to the nitty gritty. Men, this may be too much for you to bear, but if we can put up with the eight kajillion euphemisms you have for your peepee (yep, I said it) then you can just grin and bear it through this list. 

I hate the word menstruation. It reminds me of sixth grade sex ed and then I get visions of rubbers on bananas and start freaking the fuck out. What if the banana isn’t the right size, what if it’s too pointy, oh dear God, so many things could go wrong! *Ahem* Back on track….I am not fond of period either. I don’t know why, it’s just weird. I’m on my period…if it’s extra short can I say I’m on my comma?  Sometimes a girl needs a more discreet euphemism for riding the cotton pony so next time you’re stuck, try one of these doozies out!  

  1. Miss Scarlett’s Come Home to Tara 
  2. Trolling for Vampires 
  3. A Dishonorable Discharge from the Uterine Navy 
  4. Saddling Old Rusty 
  5. Feelin’ Menstru-riffic! 
  6. Clean-Up in Aisle One 
  7. Massacre at the Y 
  8. T-Minus 9 Months and Holding 
  9. Game Day for the Crimson Tide 
  10. Panty Shields Up, Captain! 
  11. Taking Carrie to the Prom 
  12. Playing Banjo in Sgt. Zygote’s Ragtime Band 
  13. Ordering l’Omelette Rouge 
  14. Arts and Crafts Week at Panty Camp 
  15. Rebooting the Ovarian Operating System 
  16. Aunt Floe is visiting
  17. When the red flag flies over egypt it’s no man’s land…

What’s your favorite term for that time of the month? Happy Friday!

 

 

 

 

Today was the awards ceremony at LW’s school to give kids their certificates for the second quarter’s academic achievements.  LW goes to a private Christian academy, so in addition to the regular awards, the kids also get awards for 100% memorization of their bible verses or passages and we sing a few “Praise Jesus, Hallelujah” songs too.  I stumble through the words and hope lightning doesn’t strike me where I stand for singing those songs.  There’s nothing worse than a hypocrite in a church!

*sidenote: I do believe in God, in fact I have a dandy relationship with the big G, I just don’t ever seem to make it to his house on Sundays. Oops*

Anywho, I digress…..this is about my fucking fabulous child and his awards, not my heathen ways. So I dropped the little tyke off in his classroom this morning – super excited because *I* was the one who brought him to school today instead of Mamacita. Then I marched over to the church and plopped down in a pew that would have a semi clear view of the stage when my shining star was up there.

In an hour and fifteen minute long ceremony, LW was on stage for ooooohhh, maybe 5 minutes. I took about 30 pictures and most of them had the head of the kid in front of me at the bottom of the frame. He wouldn’t sit still! Plus LW could see me with the camera and was not having any of my stalkerazzi biznass, so here’s what’s left…

“No! No more pictures! I want to be left alone!” img_9909

“I’m bored. Hey I can wave this piece of paper around or….I can go hands free!” img_9912_21

Finally, my shining star!

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When all was said and done, LW ended up with two awards – Perfect Attendence and Perfect Citizenship. We missed a phonics award because of one goobered assignment and he is thisclose to A/B Honor Roll – no easy task when you are learning cursive handwriting in kindergarten! Maybe next quarter…..

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Enough!

self-conceit

Today I need to rant and rave a little bit. I have tried and continue to strive to be a decent person, to think about others and help when and where  I can. My mottos in life are “Follow your bliss” and “No regrets, only lessons learned.” This week, my mottos have been shoved to the ground and trampled on by people who seem to think that their wants and needs come before everyone else’s do. OK….let’s commence with the verbal barfage……

Narcissism

Self Importance

Inconsideration

Conceit

Arrogance

Over the past week, I have been bombarded by people possessing these traits and I have had enough. If it was just one person in particular, I could shake my head and walk away, but no, I have been run down by an entire train of people who have crossed my path without stopping to look left or right in their hurry to get what they believe is rightfully theirs. If I could get them alone in a room, I would start knocking them upside their stupid heads. That said, let me squish it all together into a nice, neat ball and rant on….

The world does not revolve around you. The world and its inhabitants do not owe you any favors and it’s time you stop acting like they do. If I hear one more person say, “so and so or such and such owes me.” I will scream. Nobody owes you anything. Things need to be earned.

Trust

Respect

Love

Money

Your job

You don’t deserve any of it until you figure out that you are not the center of this or any universe. 

There’s no full moon. The witching hour doesn’t last all day. There is no excuse for the behaviors that I have witnessed. It’s time to stop thinking about yourself and think about somebody else. I don’t care if it’s anyone close to you or not. There are people dying in this country because they don’t have enough to eat. There are children dying in Africa because they can’t get clean water. There are people dying in a dozen countries because they are the “wrong” religion. 

So the next time you start to hop on your pedestal and act righteous and indignant about some perceived slight someone has given you, jump back down. The world is a lot bigger than you and it’s time you realized it.

You are no better than the waitress you were nasty to for no reason.

Yelling at someone for a mistake does not make you a more important, better person.

Treating other people like crap makes you an asshole. It does not make you cool.

It’s Tuesday. I’m supposed to be kind today and I’m trying very hard, but I can’t be kind all by myself. What are you doing for someone else today?

I got tagged for this over on Facebook by the one and only Citizen Janey. It’s a different kind of meme and a whole lot of fun!  It’s all about my first baby.

1. Were you married at the time?
Yessirree Bob!

2. What was your reaction when you found out you were pregnant?
I was so excited!

3. How old were you?
29

4. How did you find out you were pregnant?
We had been trying for a few months and I just randomly took a test and POOF!

5. Who did you tell first?
DigitalRob of course.

6. Did you want to find out the sex?
As soon as we could!

7. Due date?
September 1st.

8. Did you deliver early or late?
Two days early on August 30th.

9. Did you have morning sickness?
A tiny bit. I never threw up.

10. What did you crave?
Strawberries, pineapple and blueberries.

11. What irritated you the most?
That I was not allowed to exercise – even walking -at all.

12. What was your first child’s sex?
Boy!

13. How many pounds did you gain throughout the pregnancy?
25, but I retained so much water it looked like 60.

14. Did you have any complications during your pregnancy?
Several….

15. Where did you give birth?
Summerlin Hospital

16. How many hours were you in labor?
Hmmm….we went to the hospital about 10 p.m., but I had been having contractions since about 2:00 in the afternoon. If we go by that…26 hours as LW was born at 4:04 p.m. the next day.

17. Who drove you to the hospital?
DigitalRob

18. Did you take medicine to ease the pain?
As soon as possible, unfortunately that was not until I was almost fully dilated and they determined I would need a C-Section.

19. How much did your child weigh?
7 lbs., 7 oz.

20. What did you name him/her?
LW – Little Whirlwind (heh)

22. Who does your child look like?
People say both of us, but I think he looks like himself,

23. Did you get mad at your husband during labor?
Only when he looked at the contraction monitor and said, “Wow! This is going to be a big one!”

But it was all worth it. See? dsc00016